In their shoes

how fucked up is it? that the one that dont want me, is the one i want?
lol
yeah, laugh with me cause this is a trip! i swear i'm nuts!
yeah, the bitch that seemed to open ma shit up, and fucked me up till the pain got worse than death its damn self, is the same man i want...
but i'd be lying to maself
if i was to say that i want him for me.

no,
truth is,
i want him, for my pride.
i want him, to prove to me that i can have him.

and how fucked up is that?
and here i was thinking i knew what i had in me.
that i knew that i can have him.
no i dont want him.
i wanted him, so i could leave him.
so he could feel...
no,
so he could "almost feel"
what it was like
to hurt.

yeah, i guess its true.
i want him, to hurt him.

But have i not been a predator?
to Mike, John, to Yves, Solomon, to Paul, Peter
to Ayo, Ben, to Tyrone, and the man with dreads...
to many nameless ones
have they never wished me pain?
have i never broken some hearts?

so why would i wish him pain?

i got what i was meant to have.
i got an experience.
a chance to be in their shoes.