To that one lady, Thank you.

Sometimes Mama tells stories. Most times she doesnt. I guess happy stories are easier to share. Mama has very few of those as far as Dada is concerned.

So when she does share these stories, they stick.
Call them crazy glue to the basement lining of my memories, i... remember.
Like this one that i heard when i was little.

Mama, while driving us from school... told us kids... stories. And these times you'd never see her eyes. I dont think i ever saw her cry. But i know Mam's emotions flow through my ducts. I earned these tears from her. I know, she sheds in silence.

I tell you, some things just didnt make much sense.
We were young, we didnt understand. Mama lived in America for years. She went to uni in America. Mama et Dada.

Then they had some kids. And Dada was to go visit back home. And he did.
Then Mama got the mail.

"Some woman wrote me a letter, asking me if its true that he had divorced me!" its (un)funny how shes able to yell it out to us (sometimes). Yet when she hurts, does it oh so quietly.

In an attempt to ensure she would be married to a single man, this lady wrote her a letter to confirm that he had been divorced as he had claimed.
She snooped, got Mama's address, and sent the letter.
I admire her. Back then most women wouldnt care. Even now, some wouldnt. Culture is just an excuse. Truth is, some people just dont ever have the courage to demand better.

Needless to say, they were still married.

"I moved back home immediately. They had almost had the wedding, plannings and everything!"

Thats how she ended up back home.

Years later, somewhere... Dada got his dream. He found a woman who didnt care. She along with her one daughter and a pregnant belly, moved into our home. But Mama sensed it coming. You can take a bitch out of a hood but never a hood out dat bitch.


She had moved back overseas before she arrived.


I want to be that woman.
I want to be the one to tell another...
I would want to be told.
I would want to be informed.

But lord knows its been stressful trying to get a hold of Mrs. Stella Diek.

She never answers the phone. And so, i stopped calling.

And Diek? I stopped caring. Truth is, i hardly ever did. Which is why i was not hurt. I forget about him till friends mention him. Or till i log on to blogville and see his name... or till he calls.

But it must hurt to lose. Or it must suck to be ignored.
He had been trying to contact me on msn and i really didnt know what to say so i just leave him be. But instead, he decided to start calling me continuously.
8,4,3, 10 times a day.

Once i answered and said "Hello" only for him to say "Hi Truth, how are you?"
I hung up. What am i supposed to say? I dont know! Where is the conversation to go? How are you am okay how are you oh am okay too so what are you doing oh nothing so what are you doing oh nothing... LIKE!!! SERIOUSLY!
So, thats why i hung up.

And he resumed calling... always with blocked numbers. And when i answer (hardly do), he doesnt say a word.
A coward cant ever own up.
So i usually dont pick up. And when i cant stand it anymore, i do pick up and just leave the receiver on the table so he can hang up when he is tired of being a Diek.

To Catch a Lying Diek (2)

"Come here baby..." oh, so sensually
and like a little mouse after some cheese, he came.
"Lay with me here..." we laid on the bed. I pulled him closer so that his face was only a feel's length away... i whispered...
"Baby, do you believe in God?"
"Yes."
"How much?"He looked confused, and horny.
"Alot. I cant put a numerical value on it."In the background played the melody his roommate was making with his knife and cutting board.
"shhh... do you hear that?"
"what?"
"That sound... outside... in the kitchen..."
"YEah?"
"How much do you believe that that sound exists?"

"100%"
"Okay, so... baby?"
"Yeah?"
"How much do you believe in God?"
"100%"I smiled. Impressive. Good answer.
"So, do you believe in Karma?"
"Well, sort of" his face made a U-turn at horny, turned right and partked on confusion street.
"You know, theres been times when i have experienced some dreadful episodes in the past but couldnt cry about them...because i knew that i deserved them. And then theres been other times that i had known that though i was dealt some sore cards, the circle had only begun because Karma was going to get whoever did me wrong... those times, i knew i didnt deserve to go through that... "He looked like a reindeer in easter...lost.
"Okay, so riddle me this... why didnt you tell me you had a son?"You could have fit a whole house in his nostrils, they flared so high.
"...oh and... how is Mrs. Sara Diek?"


He sprang up like the bed had fired him up. Paced around in the room for a minute before finding his voice:
"How did you know?"
"Why didn't you tell me about them?" i didn't wait fr a response because really, it didn't matter "I TOLD you i didn't care if you had kids! couldn't you have at least been honest with me about that?"
Here comes his mini-discovery moment! Finally his brain was coming to... "OH! did you look through my flash drive?"
I hadn't. Lord knows what else i would have found there.
"Your Flash drive? no actually i didn't. SHOULD i have looked in there?"
"You must have looked through my computer"
"Well, you keep wondering how i found out, and I'll keep knowing how i found out."
I turned away, did some of my paper work as he dealt with his confusion. It got really quiet. He was thinking. And like he had finally found sobriety, he said:
"Come here..." in the softest way i had ever heard him speak. But softness was not what i was looking for right then. Fuck the mother of softness. I dashed him a "nigga, you cant be serious" look, burning shame down his spine. He backed away, thinking. Okay, now it was time for me to phuk him up. Its simple: I have enough shit on him to live off for a year. Anyhow he says he doesn't want to fly me back home, I'll simply book myself an executive flight with his VISA number and call his parents back home to let them know just how much funds he shells out for females to come see his married ass in his make-shift home. Really, it was that simple.
I was about to say something. I was about to hit him real hard. I was SO sure the fool would try to phuk me up. But i didn't expect this:
"Truth? I am so sorry." softly "So so sorry that i hurt you"
HURT. That word didn't meet its match in me. "Hurt"? No. I couldn't find it in myself. I didn't know why, but there was this nagging feeling of relief, and not one drop of pain or hurt. I wanted to be angry. But i wasn't. I wanted to be hurt, but i wasn't. I wanted to be disappointed, but i wasn't. Bloggers, i was in another girl's body. Anger betrayed me at the one time that i needed it the most; took a drastic break from me right then. I was not hurt. Neither could i be angry. I told myself it might be because my anger was on vacation till he starts to try to act up by telling me that he wont book my flight. I settled for that. Okay, maybe i wont be angry till then.
I smiled "Diek, you didn't hurt me. And for some reason, I'm not angry. So you don't have to be sorry for hurting me. I am not hurt."
He pulled closer "See, this is what draws me to you." He looked so wrong. Like he had been caught doing a goat, like he had been found guilty, he looked so wrong. i looked up at him. For one second i was sure he was on crack, but even that certainty didn't prepare me for this as i asked him:

DENIAL
"Why didn't you tell me you had a son?"
"I didn't have a son when you asked me"
okay, now i was a tab bit angry. This motherEffer didnt jut try to justify that shit
"Wait, so your conscience allows you to tell a person that you didn't have a child even though your child's birth was only a month away? Even though his heart had been beating for SEVEN whole months?! YOUR CONSCIENCE is THAT SKEWED THAT YOU CAN TELL A PERSON THAT WITHOUT BEING burchered to death with GUILT?!"
No answer. Of course. Why would he answer?
"Truth, you will always have a special place in my heart. I have so much love for you. I don't want it to end this way."
"A place in your heart? Right next to your wife and kids?"

BARGANING
Okay, then out of a funky blue:
"Would you marry me?"
I thought i had heard wrong. I looked on his face and got a confirmation. My ears weren't playing tricks on me. This idiot had seriously asked me that. And bloggers, i tell you this is the one moment i wish i could change that night. The moment that i answered the DUMBEST, most IRRATIONAL, question ever:
"NO! marry you ke? Are you out of your mind?"

Dumbest thing i ever said. I mean, if someone would have askd me "Truth, what is the sum of 1 and 1?" i would say "you're insulting my in telligence" if smeone was to ask me "Is the sky blue?"
I would say "Are you breathing"
Likewise, i don't understand why i actually answered his question. I felt so stupid. such silly questions don't deserve answers AT ALL!
He looked disappointed (can you imagine? what was he expecting?) as he looked away.

ANGER
There was a long moment of silence. Then came his unjust anger.
"But you shouldnt have looked through my computer now.." My eyes bulged out so quick "... that is invasion of privacy"
I wanted to slap him.
"INVASION OF PRIVACY??? INVASION? YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT INVASION? OHHHH.... YOU SEE WHY SOME FEmAlES ARE BITCHES? BECAUSE SOME MEN DON'T R\DESERVE ANYTHING BUT TO GET BITCHED AT~ YOU FOOL! JUST BECAUSE I AM STILL HERE TALKING TO YOUR SORRY ASS YOU THINK YOU CAN FLIP THIS THING ON ME? ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND? OHHHHHHHH... SO BECAUSE YOU DONT SEE ME GETTING ALL IRATE AND FUCKIN EVERY SINGLE SHIT YOU GOT UP, YOU THINK YOU CAN... YOU KNOW WHAT?" I was so sure this shit was bout to turn inside out "anyway, you better just get me a flight home."
I didn't expect this:
"Okay"
Oh... i was expecting the goat to tell me he wont and try to kick me out of his house or something. Hmm... well,... i didn't expect it to run so smooth. He booked me the morning flight.
"I am so sorry. I hope this wont ruin things between us".
"Things? What things?"
He didn't answer.
I wanted to pee so bad, but i couldn't get up. I didn't trust him one bit. I fell asleep thinking.
I woke up in the morning to see he was already up and about to go shower. it was 5:40am. My flight was to be in an hour. He got out of the shower in about 20minutes. I heard his roommate get in right after him. I looked at the time.
At 6:20 the washroom finally became free. Well, the heifer knew i would need to shower before hugging the washroom for 20 minutes. And heaven knows heres NO WAY i was about to leave that city without freshening up. I packed my wallet with me as i headed for the shower. If he would have left the house without me, at least i would have his banking information in my wallet to use to book another flight and of course, to call a cab too.
I finished at 6:45. Yes, same time my flight was leaving.
We got in the car.

DEPRESSION
"I think you're going to miss your flight"
"I better not miss it"
"Look at the time, i think you already missed it"
"Well, i dont know what you expect me to say. All i know is i'm going home today"
He drove quietly.

When we got there, we were told that we had missed the flight. The ticket was $230. And also non refundable. The clerk at the airport said
"You can book a seat on the next flight. It would cost you an additional $200."
I replied "OKAY"
Turned to Diek.
He didn't dare look at me. He paid.

I got my ticket, turned around, a "bye" and left.

I got back to the city, relieved and a little surprised. I didn't expect things to go the way they did.
Later that evening i got a call. Mr. Diek was calling. I was at China's house so i asked her if she knew how to sing, she was surprised. I told her who it was that was calling and she agreed to sing to him on the phone. At this point, i didn't want any thing to do with him. I gave the phone to her.
"Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday to youuuu happy birthday to you" and she hung up.
We had a good laugh after that one. He called back again.
SHe picked it up
"We wish you a merry christmas, we wish you a merry christmass..." and she hung up.

He didn't call back for a few days after then. Then he started calling private. Now, he didn't speak. He would just hang up whenever I'd pick it up.
Even till this morning. He is yet to reach acceptance.

I have been calling his wife's number. Their home number. I have called private and even with other numbers. Not once have i had anyone answer my call. I wonder if the wife is away. I'm THIS close to calling his mother back home but whats the point in that?
Till this day, I'm not angry. I hate this sort of serenity because, i do want to be angry. But i am not.

Yesterday, he called me with his number visible (as opposed to the other times when he calls private)and asked me the silliest question ever (oh wait... scratch that). He asked "DO you remember how much the flight cost?"
I thought he was high
"Why would I remember? Arent you the one who paid for it? Why not check your records? why are you asking me?"
WIth that said, he hung up.
I thought about calling him back to curse his forefathers. But then again, thats what he would want; my attention. I know it kills him to know that i dont give a shit. And i know that hes stuck at Anger. Someday, he'll cross over that hill and make it to Acceptance.
Asshole.


My people, feel free to share your take on this... What would you have done? Or better yet, what do you wish you would have done or think that you should do?

Lost (continued)

and only 50minutes later, the circle has been completed.
And i hate to say i told you so
so i wont.
but i will ask
"So, babe...Is this it? Or will you need to make yet, another round?"

Sometimes, you need the craze to get the glue!

I havent seen my family bond so well as they have these past couple of days.
We've spent these past days together. We've come together, to support one another.
Theres been times when i wondered if it would have made a difference if it wasnt Ambition in that hospital bed.
Would it be any different if it was I, for example?
Ambition is well loved. She is blessed with the priviledge of chairing our parent's heart.
And it would have made it easy to envy her if it wasnt her.
But she makes it so hard. So hard to hate her.
I cant.

Ever heard of a coworker that gets awarded for everything- being on time, being conscientous, being the best worker, THEN you meet her only for her to be the nicest person ever?

Ambition is too easy to love.
So although it was hard being her sibling when i was little, i couldnt hate her.
because she loved me, and everyone else so perfectly. She was simple. She was an easy person.


shes getting better and i'm so glad.
Thanks to everyone thats expressed their best wishes, hope you never get to experience this.
Rumour says she might be discharged tomorrow.

I'll conclude with a joke that happened yesterday.
Its funny now but when it happened, it was quite embarrassing.

Okay so picture Ambition, my nephew and neice, my other sister (Fierce), my brother, and a third sister (Aqua) sitting in the living room, talking, laughing, and chilling when my brother in law (Bode) picked up my cell phone from the coffee table.
Hes a jester so i knew he was teasing when he said
"your phone is so cheap, it doesnt even have a camera feature, does it?"
"it does, its a camera phone!"
"oh, so you have pics in it?"
"yeah, check the gallery and then check the images in there for pics"

and so he did.
Now, i know that i have a secret that only I and Fierce knows of in my family.
I take nude pics.
I love nudity and I've often wondered if it'd make a difference if i didnt think i had a nice body. I dont think it would.
Fierce use to beat me for it when i was young. She'd scold me to tears and lecture me for hours and she'd make me rip the nude pics i'd taken- but that was when i was younger. Now i'm older, an adult. She'd lost the right to scold me. She'd lost that fight, bless her soul!
But anyway, Fierce didnt say anything, and neither did i.
i was so sure i didnt have any nude pics in my cam.
I was wrong.

I had China take a nude pic of me a lil while ago- its a pic of me in a fetal position,facing downward, naked but a thong...
yeah, Bode saw it
and flipped it around to show me what he saw, but because i was sitting far from him, everyone saw it.
I tell you, i would've turned purple if i could have, but my wealth of melanin deprived me of such.
Yeah, it was so embarrasing.
My mom was like
" oh my goodness!" "what are you? a stripper, now?!!!"
"sure mom! would you like to watch me strip one of these days?"
needless to say, she didnt reply... My mom is pretty reserved and she'd rather not say much in these sort of instances.
the poor woman was short of words. I dont think i can suprise her anymore.
lol

Anyway, so that was that!

Chisel, lets write a book

Come here...
closer.
i want to speak to you
and i want you, to listen... to me.
to my heat, my curves, me...
listen to my body
I want to speak to you
adore your shaft
I!
I want to love you
Love those hands, praise those fingers that feels me whole
I want to bless you
with me,
Let me... welcome you
So come here
I want to hold you
So much, deep in the tightest part of my being
right deep down, to the side, where my pleasure resides...
i want to shiver with you
vibrate through you
warm up your soul
with this volcano
and bring you through
i want to come with you
So co...co...come... here
I want to create the sweetest love with you...

Introducing... the man who started it all; Chad.

16 year old me, walking down the street with Virgo on our way from school
it was in the evening, and with us being so young and looking,
It was great when a red car (a car? definitely a plus!) pulled up next to us

This wasnt a suprise, afterall i have that "it"

you know what i mean by "it", right?
....
that "it" is the thing that makes you hear me even before you see me
you feel invincible waves of femininity hitting your senses before you encounter the being that is me
You, get to know that this thing you are about to encounter, is a woman... of... high... esteem!

Chad saw "it" in me.

He pulled over, said hi.
i knew he was talking to me, VIrgo simply stepped a foot behind.
Virgo and i had that understanding; we simply "knew who they were attracted to; even without being told. Chad wanted me. I felt it a mile away.
we talked i didnt want to waste time. i had better things to do...
he had a hot car, but i wasnt about to waste time with a convo.
i flirted, a little. then headed my way. he asked to have my number, but i refused.
"i'll call you if you give me yours"
and he did.
i shouldnt have taken the number.
i knew he was older, but i thought it was the perfect age for me.
the men around me didnt seem to "fit". i knew i wanted a matured man. But not as old as i eventually found out Chad was.

I didnt call Chad. and probably neve would have. Until the night i went home from school and realised i got locked out. I was cheesed. It was freezing cold! i stayed over at the neighbour's house and they made me a cup of hot chocolate. ut i felt uncomfortable. I felt like a burden.

"hmm... you know, that guy could come in handy now"
so i called him.
He picked me up in a jiffy...
and that was my first time really getting to "know" Chad.

TBS told me...

a few days ago that he'll be moving
no, not to the next town
no, not to the next city,
no not to the next state
but to a few states away

i asked why and he said because it'll be easier to find a job there

i knew right then that this was it
if he left, i wouldnt have any more contacts with him
after so many years, it'd befinally over

but today, he told me he got a job

so he'll be staying.

but heres the drama of the day.

he went out last weekend with an old friend- Kramer
Kramer is a guy he's been friends with for ages
Kramer knows about me
we all use to hang out. I like Kramer
I always thought he was one of TBS's better friends

anyway so when they went out, TBS met a girl
he got the girl's number, and that was it

he later called me today to tell me all of this
for bloggin sake, we'll name the girl "The girl in yellow"

TBS: i gave a girl my number last weekened when i was out with Kramer
Truth: ya? ok.
TBS: *laughs* she knows you
Truth: WHAT?! who is she? whats her name?
TBS: i dont know her name. but when i was talking to her on the phone, she said she knows you and she said your name and she said she recognized me from a picture you put on on Facebook.

its true, i did have his picture on facebook. Its a picture we'd taken a last valentines' day.

Truth: what the fuck do you mean you dont know her name?
TBS: i dont remember her name
Truth: well, whats her number
TBS: (783) 893-2748
Truth: ok *hangs up*

i called the number, with my number blocked and got the answering machne. i can tell by the girl's voice that shes from a similar background. I couldnt tell who it was. i was killin myself just wondering
Imagine the embarrassment! no one knows him and i broke up and now, EVERYNE will think he's cheating on me! i was so upset! i went to Facebook and immidiately deleted the picture we had. i couldnt believe it.
then he called back
TBS: im at your door. can you please open the door?"

Remembering... Jack Jean-Maygne

Jack...
ohhh jack...
Jack is a friend i met at school
i had just transffered to a new high school
and i had seen Jack around the school
but Jack didnt catch my eye
neither did anyone else really
I was battling my own troubles,
enough to make me blind to the men around me

But jack
ohhh jack...
Jack started talking to me at school.
When he noticed i lived up the street from him
i'd bump into him on my way from school
and he had such a sweet smile
and although he wasnt one of the popular boys
i saw his beauty
he was so fine
i saw Jack.

But Jack didnt see me.
or did he?

Jack had a childhood friend named Henry. They were like twins. I had a thing for him too. Didnt dare tell anyone. didnt wanna ruin the friendship between us.

But i should have. Because a mutual friend later told me years after graduation that his twin had the bggest crush on me, but he couldnt tell me ... aint dat sad? i saw him a year ago at the local movie theatre. he didnt look thesame. he also didnt care thesame. said "hi" to me like i wasnt nothing. so i replied "how are you?" to him like he was almost forgotten. thats the end of the story of me, and Henry.

At this time when i knew Jack and Henry, they were friends with my female friends in school. I was dating a much older photographer, and he had taken some nude professional (reaaally nice) pics of me. I being the daring silly shameless girl that i can sometimes be, decided to bring the pics to school, and show them to these friends. They werent my friends for real. They passed the pics onto Jack and Henry. I was upset and disappointed. I ran after Jack and Henry, embarrassed and desperate to recover the pics before they too disappoint me, by showing the pics to other people. They didnt.

They called me aside, asked me to catch ma breath (it was strenuous running after the two guys), and simply asked questions about who took them, when and similar Qns. They complimented me (boys will be boys), and asked if they could have copies (again, boys will be boys). i refused blatantly. They gave up, returned my pics and that was it.

But our friendship continued.
I and Jean got closer. He'd confront me about his girls (which was hard since i wanted him), which were usually light skinned (usually not black), long hair, skinny, pretty, chicks... i knew i wasnt his type. I'd always give him honest advises and my advises always worked. He even went as far as recommending Henry to speak with me when he had "girl issues". It was cool.

I liked them both.

Jack for his skin tone, his pretty face, and his height.
Henry had the charisma. Oh ma gawd! he was so sweet.
Henry had the ability to make me laugh till my ribs ached.
He never said it, but i knew Jack envied Henry for this because
Although Henry was obese, he had girls wanting him
because he had that "thing"... he was charismic
Together, they were perfect.
And I was in love.

WE ended it (2)

continuing...

So as i told him to wait, i went over to my PC, covered the screen with one hand as i closed the page with the other.
he got suspicious and asked why i did that and i simply explained to him... "its my webpage, i want it to remain known to me andonly me. i want it to remain annonymously mine. if i know that you know the page, then i cant use the page anymore" "its my therapy..."

he didnt buy this (even though it was the truth), he figured theres something there i had to hide.
he was right.
but so was i.
i didnt want him seeing one of the posts i had there. there are more than one posts there about him but theres one that i Really dont want him to view.
i really did use my old blog for therapy. if he knew my blog address, then how can i be true about what i post there, without considering his feelings?

he started to explain that he didnt like that i closed it, that i didnt want him to see it
Me: u're paranoid man
JC: its just like at work, you know... when ppl start saying something and the moment you walk into the room, they stop. you know its about you. i know what you have there is about me.
Me: i have told you that yes, some of the things on it are about you, but its nothing i mind you seeing. i just simply dont want yo knowing my blog address. so how about this; i'll go on my blog, change my blog address and name and all that, and then allo you to navigate through it all you want. then when you're done, i'll change it back to its usual name. that way, you wont have to worry about it anymore, AND my address remains safe from you.
JC: (no answer)
Me: ooookayyyyyyyy
JC: its also like when you're at work, and ppl start speaking a different language just because you're there...
Me: i dont blame people for speaking different languages sometimes. i mean, i shouldnt have to give up on my language just because i'm in a different language.
JC: so what are you doing here then? (i.e what are u doing in canada...)
Me: (long pause) (yells:) you're one ignorant motherfucker! YOU THINK JUST BECAUSE I CAME TO ANOTHER COUNTRY MEANS I SHOULD FORGET EVERYTHING ABOUT WHERE I'M FROM? YOU SHOULD TELL THAT TO UR MOTHER WHO SPEAKS PATOIS EVERY CHANCE SHE GETS! WHY NOT ASK HER TO GO BACK TO JAMAICA EVERYTIME SHE SPEAKS PATOIS?!
JC: starts to prance around the room looking for his belongings, starts to detach my key from his bunch of keys(he had a copy of my condo keys)
Me: ya, u can leave that on the table
JC: left the key on the vanity set, and walked out

by the way, did you notice how the conversation tansited from the pc issue, the trust issue to the work issue and then the ignorance issue? we started with one topic and ended with another.

he called an hour and a half later...
Me: hello?
JC: yes. i dont know, i'm not happy with you. i know this isnt going anywhere
Me: well i think we both know its been over for a long while now
JC: yes, its been over
long unncesary talk.... then
Me: okay, bye
JC: bye

i got off the phone, started this blog, then called up the most unlikely suitor i know (i'll tell you about him later), just to pass time and maybe, remind myself that i'm still wanted by a man (regardless how unattractive the man is)

WE ended it

my boyfriend came over a few hours ago
he had said he'd be over here
but he came about 10 hours after he'd previously said
that bothered me
but i got over it because i understood that he had other things to do
what i didnt understand was
why he acts all funny


i know he has a mental illness

i know he does
being the expereinced depressive chic that i am
and being the mental illness fanatic that i am
i know that he has a mental illness
why?
because he thinks
and no i dont mean "think" as in... "oh, hes such a great thinker!"
i mean think as in
24hrs, constantly tryna make sense of things even though its nothin, til it becomes something...
that kind of a thinker


but he doesnt understand that he needs help

and what is can u do with a thirsty horse but take it to a river?

if i suggest you see a shrink and you refuse, what can i do?
nothing.
so i did nothing but put up with ur shit

but anyway, he came over today, we kissed as usual
not the kind of kissin we use to have
the kind that use to make me shiver
that;d send 350volts of energy down ma spine

but the kind that we do just to prove to the world that... we're still in love
the kind we do just to catch each other in that moment that we're maybe not feelin the other anymore
do you know what i mean?
the kind of "peck" you give so the other person doesnt think that you dont like them anymore...
thats what kind of kiss we had

i got into ma bed
and you did thesame
we talked about your car, about silly little things that i dont remember
then you got up, wanted to use my pc
but knowing that i had ma webpage open, i told you to "wait a minute"
as i wanted to close ma webpage

and of course
being the psychotic naive idiot that you are, you got a ll paranoid and decided to wonder why i did that


To be continued...